For the uninformed and the uninitiated, Modern Warfare 2’s competitive multiplayer game has recently run into a problem involving players exploiting a glitch that allows them to FUCKING EXPLODE AND DECIMATE ANYONE STANDING WITHIN A 50 FOOT RADIUS OF THEIR DYING BODY. The glitch works like this: Equip a javelin missile launcher, “do” the glitch (Google it. It’s disgustingly easy.), run into a group of players, DIE, they rack up the points as you immediately take them down with you, you cheap-ass, son-of-a-bitch.

If you’re finding out about this now, I’m sure that you think that the glitch is hilarious. You’re right, it is. It’s especially funny when two “glitchers” cross paths. It turns into this absolutely hilarious staring match of two idiots trying to figure out the best way to handle this impossible situation. If one stabs the other, the other explodes. Is one, measly kill worth the trouble? Anyway, the initial hilarity fades quickly when every game you enter is nothing more than a series of exploding retards.

Infinity Ward says the fix will be out soon. According to Mr. Robert Bowling, the PS3 fix is “in the pipeline” and the Xbox 360 patch is currently in Microsoft certification. A warning note to all you crazy, ’splosion men: Microsoft is threatening exploit-abusers with a 24 hour ban, but I’d say you probably have a better chance at getting struck by lightning, so bombs away.

So what are all of the honest gamers left to do until this game-breaking situation is resolved? Try playing a different game mode. “Search and Destroy” seems fine whenever I have tried it. If the suicide bombers find you there, play Left 4 Dead 2!

Although it might not feel like it just yet (in 78 degrees in New York City), Summer is here and it’s gonna get hot. Tell your avatar to take off that tuxedo and get into these cool summer clothes. Major Nelson gives up the scoop:

Male
Rashguard
White Vest
Swim Shorts
Surfer Shorts

Female
Flower Vest
Surfer Hot Pants
Surfer Shorts
Surfer Skirt
Surfer Dress

I didn’t know that a “wife-beater” is really called a “white vest”!

Followers of Major Nelson’s Twitter were treated to a pretty strange site this morning: Twitter, Facebook, Last.FM, and Sky branded Xbox Box 360 consoles.

There’s no word on whether or not these are going to be released to consumers as limited edition consoles or merely skins, but seeing as Twitter is quickly becoming my favorite thing on the internet I definitely wouldn’t mind scoring one of those cute little light-blue consoles. Aww….

Hey, as long as I can virtually blow people to bloody matter with a shotgun over Xbox Live, what does it matter if my 360 is adorable? What do you think? Do you plan on trading your red Resident Evil 5 console for a red Last.FM one any time soon? Let me know in the comments.

With flagship franchises such as the Metal Gear and Final Fantasy series jumping the exclusivity ship, developer Ubisoft is keeping the “Only on Xbox” Splinter Cell planted firmly within it’s roots.

In a special Dev Q&A on the Ubisoft web-forums Thursday, the minds behind Spilnter Cell Conviction broke the news to PS3 owners hoping to get their hands on Ubisoft’s latest:

Q. I saw the splinter cell conviction gameplay today but then I found out that it isn’t coming out on the PS3. Why would you do that ?

A. Splinter Cell conviction is a true Microsoft exclusive title and there are no plans to have Splinter Cell Conviction on other platforms. There are several reasons behind this choice. First of all, Splinter Cell games are historically linked with Microsoft platforms. The first Splinter Cell on the original Xbox was one of the first games to fully exploit the console’s technical possibilities. At that time, Microsoft really believed in the game potential and provided strong support to promote it. So, there is a “link of heart” between the franchise and the platform. Some games are like this (think of Final Fantasy for instance). The second reason behind this choice is purely linked to production. Having a single target platform means that we can optimize the game even further, because we only have one type of – console – hardware to support.”

Believe it or not, I was never a fan of the Splinter Cell series. The Metal Gear games were always my stealth title of choice. Though after seeing the trailer and game play footage at E3, I’m ready to give Sam Fisher another chance. This game looks amazing. Check out the trailer for Splinter Cell Conviction below:

Whoa. This is getting crazy.

First: 1up.com says that Microsoft will release a new, upgraded Xbox 360 for 2010.

Second: Team Xbox reports that this is untrue and says that they know the truth of the situation and promises to release their inside information in the coming weeks.

THIRD! TG Daily report that at the Executives Club in Chicago, which they attended, Steve Ballmer announces the new console saying the new device will come equipped with technology that is “really, really, close” to being realized (Project Natal).

This comes three days after Team Xbox releases this on their Twitter account:

“…in addition to built-in Natal tech, a key feature of the next Xbox would be full HD stereoscopic 3D visuals similar to 3D movie theatres.”

Holy s*** that’s awesome! We’ll keep you all posted!

Yukon Cornelius has informed me that for a limited time, of course, the friendly folks over at Microsoft are allowing silver members (peasants) to upgrade to a gold membership (the good life) for a whole month, for only one of your parent’s dollars. If you’re a silver member, jump on this offer because this is what you’re missing out on:

Online multiplayer matches
Early and exclusive titles at the marketplace
TrueSkill matchmaking
Xbox Live Parties (greatest feature ever)
Gamer feedback
NETFLIX MOVIES!
Pretty much everything

PS3 users tend to taunt Live members for paying $50 bucks a year for the premium service, but most gamers with both consoles will tell you that the Xbox Live experience is indeed, “Very premium, yes. Like my dance moves and Sammy Davis Junior Junior.”

REVIEW BREAKDOWN
type: Game review
platform: Xbox 360, PS3
+: a true, authentic Ghostbusters experience that caters to fans of the movies
+: the actual “ghost busting” is a blast
+: voice acting is great, thanks to the original cast
+: most of the environments are fantastic
+: goes above and beyond most other licensed games
-: friendly AI can be pretty dumb
-: a little more variety in the action would be nice
-: I wish the firehouse was more interactive
-: very minor bugs found throughout the game
gamer appeal: fans of the movies will LOVE this game
comparisons: Dead Space, Gears of War, Resident Evil 4 & 5

gameESC score:

As with most twenty-somethings such as myself, the Ghostbusters were a big part in my childhood. I had my own proton-pack, ghost trap, firehouse replica, Ecto-1 car. You name it, I had it. My mom threw a Ghostbusters themed party for my 6th birthday and hired some guys who dressed up in the flight suits and had built their own Ecto-1 to show up and hang out with us.

I wanted to be a Ghostbuster so bad.

As you can imagine, when the Ghostbusters game was announced I was incredibly excited, though when the days started getting closer to June 16th, fear started to creep into my mind and the questions I tried to block out pushed through my naive skull: What if this game sucks? What if they destroy all that I loved about Peter, Ray, Egon, and Winston as a child? Having enjoyed Bloodrayne 2 back in the day, I did have some faith in developer Terminal Reality, but what if the story sucked? What if the cast is just doing this for a quick buck?

Why is it that in the year 2009 a Ghostbusters game is being made, 20 years after the last movie!??
(more…)

Whenever a multi-platform game drops, have you ever felt like you were being shafted by a company just because you own a PS3? For instance, you bought Grand Theft Auto 4 for the Playstation 3. How come only Xbox 360 owners get the expansion pack? The Beatles: Rock Band for the 360 is getting an exclusive track. 360 owners are getting the Modern Warfare 2 maps before PS3 owners. Being a Sony follower has been tough.

Don’t worry, you guys. At least Square-Enix has your back!

In a recent interview with VideoGamer.com, FFXIII producer Yoshinori Kitase has confirmed that the Xbox 360 version of the eagerly anticipated, previous Playstation exclusive will be exactly the same as the PS3’s. Even though I’m not a PS3 owner yet (Bobdert handles that stuff), it makes me happy that Square-Enix isn’t screwing anybody out of content.

It’s been 11 days since the launch of the “1 vs 100″ beta and I must say, I really enjoy it. After the forth or fifth show it did begin to feel a bit stale, but I think any trivia game would feel that way when you’re playing it for two hours everyday. If Microsoft really pushes this Primetime Channel and actually figures out a way to add variety to their interactive programs, they might be on their way to the primetime revolution they speak about.

Just imagine: instead of your family getting together every night to watch some horrific reality show about people with 20 children or some guy with a bus full of whores, you all play a nice, fun game of trivia. Though if your family is anything like mine (or most American families), we’d taunt, curse, and scream at each other until someone punches someone in the face. Then someone always gets stabbed and rushed to the emergency room where we kiss and make up until we come home and cry and drink ourselves to sleep. The vicious cycle never ends…

But let’s be positive just for once!

What do you think about the beta and more importantly, what do you think about The Primetime Channel? Does Microsoft have the power to change how the American family finds entertainment at night? Or are you nervous that they might be taking away your only escape from the harsh realities of the real world? DISCUSS!

SEEEEEGAAAAAA!

It almost brings a tear to my eye. Remember when games were simple? The only thing I had to worry about when I would power on my JVC-X’Eye (yeah, that’s right! I’ll bet you have no idea what that is. Look it up, foo’) was getting from one side of the screen to the other.

Microsoft brings back the good ol’ days by bringing six Sega classics to the Xbox Live Marketplace. 400 points will award you any one of these gems from days long past: Altered Beast, Comix Zone, Gunstar Heroes, Phantasy Star II, Shinobi(awesome!), and Sonic The Hedgehog 3.

Those are some pretty great titles and all of them have graced my JVC X’Eye. (OK, OK. Read about this bizarre machine right here)